Helping your child cope with a chronic medical condition

Learning to live with a chronic condition can be challenging for a child, parents, siblings and friends.

Examples of chronic illnesses often seen in children and teens include asthma, atopic dermatitis, allergies to foods and/or the environment and diabetes.

"Chronic illness can interfere with the normal and happy experiences of childhood, and can deliver a real blow to a child's self esteem," said Bruce Bender, PhD, Head of the division of pediatric behavioral health at National Jewish Health. "For parents a child's chronic illness can be very difficult, frustrating and frightening. There are several ways, however, to reduce the toll chronic illness takes on a family."

Dr. Bender offers the following tips for parents helping their child cope with chronic illnesses.

• Clarify with the medical team your child's restrictions and dangers
• Explain those restrictions dangers again to your child
• Empathize with these struggles: "It IS tough taking these medications every day!" "I DON'T BLAME you for being mad or angry that you can't eat that pizza. I would be too!"
• Give them outlets to express their feelings appropriately. For example, a special time each day to talk or journal about their feelings.
• Reward your child for daily cooperation with medical management tasks, or for taking age-appropriate responsibility.
• Develop illness action plans for trusted adults to follow, such as grandparents, babysitters and school staff.
• Take a parent's break. It's important for parents to maintain their mental health as well.

Parents are likely to be the first to notice if their child is having difficulty coping with a chronic condition. Dr. Bender says parents should seek professional help if they notice any of the following:

• A change in mood and behavior
• School problems
• Sleep disturbances
• Intensified sibling conflict
• A lack of cooperation with medical management
• Increasing social withdrawal

"When children are distressed and unhappy, their illness may be harder to control. The good news is that help is available," said Dr. Bender. "We have a highly experienced group of behavioral health clinicians who can help to make sure that chronic illness does not prevent them a child from being emotionally healthy and happy".

Provided by National Jewish Health