What's mine is mine, what's yours is ... also mine

January 17, 2014 by Olivia Carter, The Conversation
Max finally gets his turn on the grandparent’s communal toy tractor.

At 21 months my boy Max still speaks largely in single syllables. "Ba" means "ball", "bath", "bottle" and somewhat surprisingly also "yoghurt". But there is one syllable that appears to have no equal and is often shouted out like some sort of primal scream: "MMMMMMMYYYYYYYY!"

Gone are the days were we can simply distract Max by dangling something shiny in front of his face while we take a toy right out of his hand. Now possession counts for everything.

Just the other day he spent half an hour lying on the couch with a copy of the book The Rosie Project (324 pages of black and white text). Every time I tried to take it off him he screamed "MMMMMMYYYYYYY!" There was nothing I could do to distract him. Nothing he would accept as an offer of exchange.

His completely irrational attachment to my book reminded me of a talk I heard a few years ago by Daniel Gilbert. His work explores why people value their possessions far more than others do … or as he eloquently describes one of the driving influences of :

... why people who own lava lamps demand more to give them up than the people who do not own lava lamps will pay to get them. Deals go unmade and storage lockers remain filled with lava lamps that are destined never again to glow.

In his study half the people were given a mug and asked how much they would sell it for, while the other half were given money and asked how much they would pay for the mug. The study showed that owners of the mugs valued them at nearly twice what the other group were willing to pay.

Based on this and other studies the authors conclude that the sheer act of "ownership" increases its perceived value.

With the recent Christmas coinciding with Max's new found understanding of ownership we have definitely entered the share-phobic phase toddlerhood – a phase that apparently extends well into adulthood.

Just a couple of days ago Max passed the next language milestone, and is starting to produce the odd two word/syllable "phrase". As he frantically repeated "MY TU … MY TU … MY TU … MY TU" I was unsure what he wanted until my daughter Susie ran up and screamed "NO MAX! IT'S MY TURN NEXT. I'M THE OLDEST!

If nothing else this new development vindicated my decision to get Max a hula hoop for Christmas … one just like his sister! He has no idea what to do with it but happily drags it around the house telling anyone that will listen that it is his.

Explore further: Researchers discover a tumor suppressor gene in a very aggressive lung cancer

Related Stories

Researchers discover a tumor suppressor gene in a very aggressive lung cancer

January 9, 2014
The Genes and Cancer Group at the Cancer Epigenetics and Biology Program of the IDIBELL has found that the MAX gene, which encodes a partner of the MYC oncogene, is genetically inactivated in small cell lung cancer. Reconstitution ...

Lava lamps: 50 years old and still groovy

September 2, 2013
Call them '60s relics or hippy home accessories, lava lamps have been casting their dim but groovy light on interiors for half a century, having hit British shelves 50 years ago on Tuesday.

Babies' ability to detect complex rules in language outshines that of adults: study

September 10, 2012
New research examining auditory mechanisms of language learning in babies has revealed that infants as young as three months of age are able to automatically detect and learn complex dependencies between syllables in spoken ...

Recommended for you

Depression changes structure of the brain, study suggests

July 21, 2017
Changes in the brain's structure that could be the result of depression have been identified in a major scanning study.

Many kinds of happiness promote better health, study finds

July 21, 2017
A new study links the capacity to feel a variety of upbeat emotions to better health.

Study examines effects of stopping psychiatric medication

July 20, 2017
Despite numerous obstacles and severe withdrawal effects, long-term users of psychiatric drugs can stop taking them if they choose, and mental health care professionals could be more helpful to such individuals, according ...

Study finds gene variant increases risk for depression

July 20, 2017
A University of Central Florida study has found that a gene variant, thought to be carried by nearly 25 percent of the population, increases the odds of developing depression.

In making decisions, are you an ant or a grasshopper?

July 20, 2017
In one of Aesop's famous fables, we are introduced to the grasshopper and the ant, whose decisions about how to spend their time affect their lives and future. The jovial grasshopper has a blast all summer singing and playing, ...

Perceiving oneself as less physically active than peers is linked to a shorter lifespan

July 20, 2017
Would you say that you are physically more active, less active, or about equally active as other people your age?

1 comment

Adjust slider to filter visible comments by rank

Display comments: newest first

russell_russell
not rated yet Jan 19, 2014
The published story here has a brief description from the end of a long page out of nature's book: neologism. The appearance of this development is normally sound.
A page of nature for all humans.

One can only speculate where and how a sense of possession arises.
Even the space we occupy only lasts a lifetime.

Please sign in to add a comment. Registration is free, and takes less than a minute. Read more

Click here to reset your password.
Sign in to get notified via email when new comments are made.